Immigration Induced Depression (IID)

Could This Insidious Illness Be Affecting You?

Prescription bottle

Symptoms: feelings of overcrowding; hearing voices in other languages; feeling put upon for the benefit of others with whom you share little culturally, linguistically or politically; being besieged by millions who constantly assert they are doing you a favor by participating in your economy.

Exacerbating conditions: Mexican music, bilingual ballots, pregnant foreigners, mainstream newspapers, National Public Radio, public transportation, the slogan “We are a nation of immigrants.”

Treatment: remove patient to environment free of stressor, e.g. Montana.

Prognosis: deteriorating condition unless immigration reform is massively prescribed.

— Tim Aaronson